Opinions, Column

We Hate This Snow (But Love Democracy)

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Fun in Academic Buildings: They can be used for more than just class.

CSOM Friends: Because we know that they will be able to take care of us when we are unemployed after graduation.

The Village People: Who doesn’t like a throwback to the ’70s?

YMCAs: Providing activities for young people since the 1800s.

Trail Mix: When we are out of real food, this is what sustains us.

Handlebars: Bicycles. Motorcycles. Mustaches.

Chocolate Baskets: You know you’ve got a good future employer if he or she sends you a congratulatory basket of Godiva chocolate.

Bank of Japan: For taking serious action against the imminent threat of deflation. Other central banks should take a page out of your book.

Elections: Freedom. Liberty. Participation in our form of government. We are afforded a privilege that many in the world do not have. So, go out and vote.

Retiring Old Debt … Really Old Debt: The government of the United Kingdom is considering retiring some old perpetuities. Today, 30-year bonds are typically the longest maturity out there, but these bonds are from 1927, issued when Winston Churchill was Chancellor of the Exchequer (basically Britain’s more pretentious title for Secretary of the Treasury). What’s even better is that those bonds were issued to retire debt from World War I, the Crimean War, and the collapse of the South Sea Company. Damn, that’s old.

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Early Snowfalls: Well, we told you that it would happen eventually. After a solid two months of not including weather in TU/TD, yesterday has brought it back to the forefront of our minds. For those of you who were not at BC last semester, we would like to make it known that we hate the snow. We really do. It’s too early for this s—t.

November: The only redeeming factor of this month is Thanksgiving … well, and the opportunity to go a month without shaving. Not that we need a month set aside to do this. Otherwise, this is a useless month. If we are going to be forced to be cold and miserable, let’s get to December already.

Juice: It’s just fruit pee.

Whistles: They are awful. We can’t think of anything that was more annoying Saturday night. They should never be a part of a costume.

Featured Image by Graham Beck / Heights Senior Staff

November 2, 2014