(Jashodhara Jindal / Heights Editor)
Malala Yousafzai needs no introduction—she needs a reintroduction.
Since she was just 15 years old, Yousafzai has lived in the public eye. After surviving an attack by a Taliban gunman, Yousafzai was thrust onto the global stage, gaining renown for her resilience and subsequent activism.
To many, Yousafzai is defined by her bravery in the face of violence. But this is far from her entire story.
Finding My Way, Yousafzai’s newest memoir, which releases on Oct. 21, shows that there’s more to her than just the headlines. With both honesty and vulnerability, Yousafzai recounts her journey through high school, college, and post-grad as someone whom the world believed they knew.
“I remember being in a coma at the hospital while people were hearing my story, defining me as a young, brave activist,” said Yousafzai. “I had yet to find out who I was.”
Yousafzai released her first book, I Am Malala, a year after surviving the attack. Though I Am Malala is an honest account, the story of her as an inexperienced 15-year-old is told within the framework of external factors: the history, the politics, and culture that surrounded her.
Yousafzai was cast as a figurehead of bravery, but she also knew she was adventurous and funny—she was more than just a singular event. Finding My Way is Yousafzai’s way of redefining how the world sees her.
“I call this new book Finding My Way because I feel like my journey of exploring my life, finding who I am, actually began much later,” said Yousafzai.
Aiming to share the most personal reflections about her life to date, Yousafzai spoke with friends and combed through her journals. Yousafzai discovered that some of the moments which she had once laughed off had, in truth, been quite painful.
“I did not want to focus on making myself into this hero who somehow gets through difficult times and, in the end, she wants to do what she wants,” said Yousafzai. “I wanted to talk about the moments when I have doubts. I wanted to talk about the moments where I felt broken.”
Finding My Way offers intimate glimpses into Yousafzai’s life as she strives to remain true to herself.
Yousafzai never thought she would be able to tell this story. After entering the recovery process from her attack, Yousafzai was offered a therapist to manage the trauma. Yousafzai rolled her eyes at the time, believing it to be no help when the physical pain was so intense.
But a few years later, Yousafzai experienced a traumatic encounter with a bomb that triggered recurring panic attacks, lasting months. On a friend’s recommendation, Yousafzai began to see a therapist, which she recounts as an important turning point.
Though Yousafzai was extremely disappointed in herself at first, her therapist explained that unresolved anxiety and PTSD are what gave her these attacks. She learned not to blame herself, and from there she began to work at improving her mental health.
“Getting out of that helped me understand what true bravery and resilience means,” said Yousafzai.
With the hope of helping destigmatize therapy, Yousafzai wants her readers to know that it’s okay to seek professional help. And to those feeling overwhelmed balancing academics with extracurriculars, Yousafzai assures that she’s been through that as well.
Academic support helped Yousafzai balance school with her activism, work, and recovery process. Education is an investment in young people just as much as supporting mental health, according to Yousafzai. Schools must support their students in order to foster self-discovery.
“The whole point of a school or a college is to help a young person learn and reach their full potential,” said Yousafzai. “And if we don’t address mental health, we are not actually helping them with their learning.”
Yousafzai considers younger generations to be both optimistic and ambitious—she looks back fondly on her own time as a young and visionary activist. Although they lack extensive worldly experience, the youth challenge those around them to think differently.
“We need to look up to young people, because they remind us that we can do more,” said Yousafzai.
Finding My Way is unadulterated Yousafzai. Just like any other young person in college, Yousafzai’s story is full of messy, imperfect moments. Along with her mental health journey, Yousafzai shares anecdotes ranging from her first crush ghosting her to how she nearly failed her first year exams.
Yousafzai hopes college students will enjoy her sincerity and vulnerability and, most importantly, learn from it.
“We don’t have to be perfect,” said Yousafzai. “It’s important for us to be true to who we are.”